Archive for April, 2013:

We need to be OK with this.

WE CAN’T GET PAST THE FIRST ROUND.

WE CAN’T GET PAST THE FIRST ROUND.

WE CAN’T GET PAST THE FIRST ROUND.

(Repeat ten times, in total. Or maybe eleven. Depends on your Sabres calandar.)

WE WILL NEVER GET PAST THE FIRST ROUND.

WE ARE CURSED.

THE JIM LORENTZ BAT CURSE.

TRADING DANNY GARE CURSE.

DRAFTING SEILING INSTEAD OF BOSSY CURSE.

TRADING MIKE FOLIGNO CURSE.

TRADING ALL THOSE GUYS CURSE (seriously, Lindy to the Rags for a 2nd that became Smehlik? That’s HERESY).

#BEACUASEITSBUFFALO CURSE.

Sound familiar? It should. Losing hockey teams have a lot in common: key players go to better rinks, and so the fans evoke the good ol’ Hockey Gods, and all the ridiculous curses. Oh wait, I forgot one:

EVERY TIME I WATCH/ATTEND/THINK TANGENTIALLY ABOUT A GAME, WE LOSE.

Sabres hockey 300x195 We need to be OK with this.buffalosabresnation.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Sabres-hockey.jpg 544w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />

Yet we watch. No matter how murderous the play on ice becomes… we watch. Do they have therapists for cities, because daaaamn we need one.

To spare your eyes, I’ll take the all caps off for the rest of this post.

Oh, and it gets much more optimistic. Think you can handle that?

share save 171 16 We need to be OK with this.
Posted in: NHL, Sabres

Continue Reading

MAY DAY UPDATE: Brad May DID Kiss an Octopus. Sort of.

1

I always wanted confirmation that this really happened.

1. Brad May picks up an octopus with his stick

2. Brad May then kisses said stick

3. Brad May picks up likely the most iconic goal in Sabres history

Thanks to the wondrous social media that links us now – 20 years to the date – it’s finally confirmed.

 

 MAY DAY UPDATE: Brad May DID Kiss an Octopus. Sort of. buffalosabresnation.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/may-day.jpeg 747w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />

GLORY.

share save 171 16 MAY DAY UPDATE: Brad May DID Kiss an Octopus. Sort of.
Posted in: Sabres

Continue Reading

On Eve of NFL Draft, Mocksters Preparing for Gruesome Slaughter

Thousands tens of thousands every football nut with access to the Internet is preparing for the big day tomorrow – the actual NFL draft.

Mocksters all over the nation are hesitantly hitting the “publish” button on their blogs, and settling back into their chairs to wait for what can only be a hilarious response to all the stupid shit they said in their “profiles” and “hot takes” on the incoming NFL prospects.

It’s going to be a gruesome slaughter.

Boom 300x300 On Eve of NFL Draft, Mocksters Preparing for Gruesome Slaughterbuffalosabresnation.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Boom-150x150.jpg 150w, buffalosabresnation.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Boom.jpg 1024w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" />

BOOM: the sound you will hear as every mock draft implodes after the first trade on actual draft day. Hey look, even the explosion is mocking this whole process.

“I’ve been sweating over other mock drafts for the past couple weeks,” said the Guy at the Office today. “But I’ve got an angle. I put in trades. Also, I put in 2-5 ‘alternatives’ for each pick, so I’m pretty confident that I’ll have real success tomorrow.”

share save 171 16 On Eve of NFL Draft, Mocksters Preparing for Gruesome Slaughter

Continue Reading

How the Pominville Trade will Destroy Us All

There’s some hyperbole up there in that title.

Still, Pominville was the consummate core player – the most consistent player on the most inconsistent team. This is a team desperate to find consistency. The simple fact that it is willing to trade it away spells doom for the remaining vets on this team. (Or glory. Frankly, a trade to a contender isn’t such a horrible thing.)

Here’s the absolute certain future of most of our remaining vets:

Jochen Hecht – pretty sure he’ll actually survive this season, physically.

hecht How the Pominville Trade will Destroy Us All

And will never be forgotten. #Heccchchtptptpt

Thomas Vanek – is all sad that he lost neighbors and stuff. But people get fired from jobs and have to leave Buffalo to look for employment all the freakin’ time, so he should still just consider himself lucky Kevin Lowe paid for his family’s mortgage (for the next 5 generations). If the “rebuild” happens as quickly as it did for the Blue Jackets, he may stick around. Or not. Dollars aside, we all know he deserves a legitimate shot at a Cup.

Ryan Miller – Dude is PISSED. He wants out. I’m pretty sure he’s run out of lovely buildings to take pictures of anyway. Good luck Millsie. Hope you’re not traded to a team that has to face Crosby in the playoffs next year.

Drew Stafford – amnesty buyout.

Ville Leino – will compete hard for Stafford’s amnesty buyout.

Gerbe – will reap the rewards of the aforementioned amnesty buyout. Or be cut.

All the rest – need a new coach/GM.

Should be fun.

Go Sabres.

 

 

share save 171 16 How the Pominville Trade will Destroy Us All

Continue Reading

Darcy’s Deadline Moves: Why We DON’T Want Them

Leopold for a 2nd and a 5th/4th? And it was not even deadline day? Great value. From there, let’s examine the future of the Sabres’ GM…

share save 171 16 Darcys Deadline Moves: Why We DONT Want Them

Continue Reading

Email Updates

Get instant updates of BSN posts via email!

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner