“Tebowing” Alternatives

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First of all, let’s state some credit where credit is due:

“Tebowing” is an inspired internet meme – inspired maybe only just enough to get rid of that incredibly stupefying “planking” nonsense – but that achievement should be appreciated by all. Long after Tebow’s career is over, no matter what success or comedic failures he encounters on the field, let it be remembered that he killed Planking.

Now that that is out of the way, late’s take a quick peek at the bombardment of cutesy images of the Tebowing meme. A couple samples:

Ouch 300x168 Tebowing Alternatives

Really? Tebowing in front of Crutches Guy? That's just cruel.

kidTebowing 224x300 Tebowing Alternatives

Cute? Yes. False Idolotry? Not sure. Also not sure if "idolotry" is a correct usage. Let's just move on so we don't get bombarded by angry religious complaints.

Tebowing has taken the nation by storm, and my Twitter feed is full of folks posting their own random Tebowing poses. Goodtimes? Sure, if the lack of oxygen at Mile High is getting to your sense of the awesomely cooler memes we could be launching instead.

In spirit of that, we give you our suggestions for “Tebowing Alternatives.” Feel free to run with these, take pictures, and submit them all over the internet.

To kick things off, let’s turn to the NHL. Take it away, snark portion of my brain:

Lorentzing: holding aloft a hockey stick with a plastic bat impaled at the end. (Great Halloween costume, actually.)

Haseking: some sort of epilectic breakdancing. Open to artistic liscence.

Haseking 262x300 Tebowing Alternatives

Warning: "Haseking" not to be tried while intoxicated. You've been warned.

Folignoing: Ah, the Foligno leap! Have someone snap a pic of you with both legs tucked into your midsection. Skates optional. (Tip-o-the-sunglasses to @Jason_Griswold for offering this one up.)

12 toyota leap 300x184 Tebowing Alternatives

"Toyota!" NO. "Folignoing."

Regehring: Probably not a good idea. Involves pushing someone into a wall, really, really hard. (Tip-o-the-sunglasses to @ABielman316 for this one.) Possibly useful for Police Academy hazing.

Vancouver Riot porta potty fall 300x148 Tebowing Alternatives

The Vancouver Police got a jump on "Regehring" during the Stanley Cup Riots. Good luck topping this Port-a-loo Regehring shot.

Kesseling: Sitting all alone in the dark in a group of empty fold out chairs.

kesseling 300x168 Tebowing Alternatives

He's having a career year so far, so let's get on this one quickly.

Averying: Get up in someone’s face and wave your arms around. Don’t forget to chirp them while you’re at it.

Leinoing: Sitting on a bench, pensively, while growing a beard.

Subbaning: Diving dramatically to the ground. Make it look good, folks.

pk subban 300x200 Tebowing Alternatives

Formula: find that ref, scream in pain, then launch away!

Of course, Tebowing is a NFL thing, so this post wouldn’t be complete without a few football memes:

Dirty Birding: The internet wasn’t around enough to give this one a chance. Let’s get it on.

Mooning: Ahh, the old classic. Nothing to do with Warren Moon, actually (see picture below).

Randy Moss Moon 300x208 Tebowing Alternatives

Now retired, Randy Moss takes off his pants just like everyone else: one asscheek at a time.

Vicking: Forget this one. Worst alternative possible. Moving on.

Fitzpatricking:  I think this is my favorite. Screaming and skipping like a little girl. Get on it, Bills fans, and enjoy the bearded joyfullness.

ryan fitzpatrick Tebowing Alternatives

He's sucking in a lung-full of air ready to unleash the Fitzscream. Say what you want about the success of the o-line this season, but this scream of his can probably buy him a half second or so of extra time in the pocket. Natural defense.

Go Bills.

Go Sabres.

And go forth, and get to Fitzpatricking already.

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0 comments
ScottyMCSS
ScottyMCSS

"Fitzpatricking" can now also include telling your buddy to "go long," and then throwing it 30 feet wide and up onto someone's roof.

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